More crazy things!


In the past, I have talked about crazy things my friends do. Most recently Jill has been the subject of escapades gone wacky. Now my friend Susan, usually a sane person, has entered the arena.
To begin the story, Susan has a screened porch near the entrance to her home and she stores a key under a cushion there. It’s been there for many years and she has shown it to me several times. This prevents her from being locked out, well usually.
One afternoon, Susan returned home. She had her arms loaded with packages, and retrieved the house key from under the cushion to get in. She went into the house, set her parcels down, put the key on a table, and went about her busy day. Now, we all forget things and I am the queen of that right now. But Susan, most importantly, forgot to replace her key.
It’s not something you usually check on you when you leave the house and lock your door. You trust yourself that it’s still there or don’t even think about it. I know that feeling.
So she and her husband, Chip, locked the front door and left for the evening. I guess he just doesn’t think about the key either or trusts Susan to replace it. It was late when they came home – very late – and they were tired and full of liquid refreshment, if you know what I mean. So, when Susan reached under the cushion for her front door key, it wasn’t there. Quickly she remembered not replacing it.
Chip and Susan told me it seemed like a lot to deal with. How were they going to get in their house? Here’s where the “no alarm” pays off. If they’d had an alarm system turned on, the solution would have been a very noisy one! And there’s all that explaining to the police when they arrive.
What was the solution? They decided one of them had to go through the kitchen window. I’m not quite sure how that decision was made except Susan is a very tiny person and her husband is a big guy, so I guess there was probably little discussion.
It’s kind of a standard kitchen window, just about as wide as the sink. OK, they are tired and it’s late. Fortunately the kitchen window wasn’t locked.
If I had been in that situation, I think I would have pulled a porch chair out and stood on it to get through the window, but Chip decided he would boost Susan up for her to do the job and get in the house. In fact, he described that as kind of fun. Sure, he didn’t have to crawl through the window.
So with Chip’s hands on the boost position, Susan opened the window and began her entrance inside. It’s a good thing the sink is fairly large and that there was no glass or a knife in it. Remember, it’s really dark. She crawled literally into the sink and eventually turned around and onto the floor. Now she’s in her 60s, but still quite agile. Not all of us could do this. Her feet finally reached the floor and she went around to open the front door.
I should now say her injuries were minimal. Actually only a few bruises and soreness were still there a few days later. It’s times like this when I wish I’d been there with my video camera going. Wouldn’t you just love to have a picture of this kind of stuff?
Then, just three days later I got a text from her – “You won’t believe it, I’m locked out again!” Are you kidding me? The story was the same – she brought the key in and forgot to put it back. Now how many times do you have to do that? Put a note up somewhere when you leave to remind you about the outside key. Or better yet, take a key with you! This time it was the middle of the day so a friend had a key and let her in.
Obviously, we have to be careful about the security of our homes and leaving keys around that thieves could use. My husband, Dan, tells me that when he was growing up, many people didn’t lock their houses in Marysville. But it’s a different place now.
My friend, Susan, says after all this she has a secret, failsafe solution. I hope so. Another crawl through the window might not be so lucky! I wish her well!
(Melanie Behrens –

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