At Tuesday night’s council meeting, one member specifically said he wasn’t scolding the community, but went on to say he was disappointed in the turn out for Monday’s Memorial Day parade.
Another council member commented on the children, all wanting candy. Another council member suggested setting an appropriate tone by calling it a Memorial Day Processional, not a parade.
The problem is, this is a forseeable concern.
For the past month, we at the newsroom have received information about Memorial Day.
A variety of organizations and individuals have told us the time, the schedule and other specifics.
Each contact, however, also gave a list of dos and don’t. This list of rules was not just for the cemetery observances, but also for the parades.
Do stand and when you stand, stand straight and reverently.
Do remove your hat.
Do salute or place your hand over your heart.
Do have your children stand and hold a flag.
Do not throw candy. Do not bring pets. Do not bring children if they cannot behave appropriately. Do not talk as the parade passes by.
There will be no bikes, animals, clowns, political advertisements or festive floats as part of the parade.
The list reads like that of a Quaker meeting house, not the unofficial kick-off of summer.
And that is the point, I suppose. Except that the point is missing the mark.
Initially, Memorial Day was a communal observance to remember those we knew, those we could name, those from our community who fought for its freedom but didn’t return to it.
In years past, Memorial Day observances held a sobriety, but also an awareness that the weather is nice and summer is starting. Parades could include baseball teams and the representatives from park programs. Children were invited to the parade, even allowed to ride their bikes. The parades had soldiers and smiles. There was still a proper respect, but tempered with a joy to be alive.
But those days are past. Now, observers are told exactly how to do it. There is no recognition that some will observe differently than others and what is appropriate for some, is not for others.
Since 9-11, however, there has been a hard shift. The day is not to be celebrated. There is to be no joy that we get to celebrated the freedoms that others died for. Those who cannot show the respect are asked not to attend. They are not given the opportunity to pay respect in their way or even to learn a more appropriate way.
You do not win the hearts and mind of the people by scolding them. You can’t legislate proper respect.
We have a National Guard armory in our town. We have service men and women who are engaging and worthy of our respect. Let’s put them on display. Let’s show our children that Memorial Day isn’t just a time to remember people we can’t remember, but to celebrate them and all those who have and do put their lives on the line for ours.
That seems like a fitting tribute to me.